Hockey :: Anna Nicole Smith
July 27, 2003 / Sunday
Anna Nicole Smith vs. Tabasco
Our goalie's back. Whoo for that.
Theirs went on brain vacation or something. She was definitely not playing anywhere close to her usual level today.
Anyway, final score, 8-2.
I just burnt 2 of my fingers. Brain was off. Exhaust was hot. I can see the blisters forming. Dammit.
Ow.
Gonna go take some painkillers. Bye.
06:08 PM | Anna Nicole Smith| Comments (0)
July 13, 2003 / Sunday
Anna Nicole Smith vs. Hot Tamales
Yay, I had a fan! Nadsy showed up to watch the game. Thanks, Nadsy. You da bestest Bo Brotha in the whole wide world.
Uh, don't tell Timbo.
Hehe.
Anyway, we lost to a team we've never lost to before. Final score: 1-5. 'Twas not for lack of trying, though. We peppered their goalie with shots and she was just a brick wall tonight. Props to their goalie for a job well done. Our goalie, well, she's having a rough month, and it's showing on the ice. No complaints, though. At least she's still getting out there to play. Props to our goalie for trying. I hope things get better for her soon.
I played D and managed to take the puck all the way up the ice a few times. Got my ice legs back, it seems. Hooray for that. Too bad there was a brick wall in front of the other goal. Brick wall high, brick wall low, brick wall corners, brick wall center. I think I tried them all. Siiigh.
I hope this is all the losing we do this season. Time to start kicking some ass again.
Funny play of the night: I get tripped mid-ice, I go flying, the refs don't see it, and by the time I get up and scramble back to our goal to defend one of the other team's players is parked and shooting a rebound goal. Good goal, I tell her. Thanks, she says, and sorry about tripping you.
I have to say, that's definitely a good way to shake your defender.
Funny exchange of the night: "Are you selling those cookies?" "Oh, no, they're for Doris. I knocked her on her ass the last game. She went tumbling and I felt bad."
Isn't that cute?
10:29 PM | Anna Nicole Smith| Comments (0)
July 12, 2003 / Saturday
R-E2R vs. Anna Nicole Smith
So my annoying wrist injury from a few weeks back that I hurt playing hockey and that gets reaggravated everytime I play hockey kinda hurts.
I guess that would make sense, huh?
Excuse me ...
Had to kill a 6-legged spider just now. 2 on the left, 4 on the right. It was a Daddy Longlegs. Keyword was, since it's more of a Daddy Squishedlegs now. Heheh.
I keep on mixing up farther and further when I speak. It's starting to bug the crap out of me. The worst part is, I don't realize it until Doug points it out. Amazingly, I think he may be a bigger grammar Nazi than I am. Ooh, there's another one. Notice I said "than I" instead of "than me". More on that later.
Damn, I'm getting sidetracked. Okay, back to hockey.
We suffered our first loss this season: 0-5. Ouch!
Yeah, we got our asses whupped, but it was fun. I really like the players on the team we played tonight. Too bad we don't get to play them much this season. Screwy schedule. Bummer.
After our ass whupping we all went over to City Beach for beer and billiards. That place is like a club on Friday and Saturday nights. Cover charge and booty ho's and everything. Listening to the conversations in the women's restroom made me feel like I was at a club. "Like, oh my God! I haven't seen you in so long! And I mean, I like you! You just have this aura around you. I'm just like, 'Oh my god, is that Jennifer? It is!' Blah blah blah blah blah ..." Blech!
At City Beach I got to meet the player whom I had some on-ice issues with back in early June. She's actually pretty darned cool in person. You know how some people turn into total monsters when they get behind the wheel of a car? It's kinda like that, I think.
Garlic fries. Yum.
It's late. I'm tired. I need to spray No B.O. all over my gear and hang it up and take a shower and go to bed. Big car day tomorrow. It's gonna be happy inside and out and have new badass bumper lights. Whoo.
01:31 AM | Anna Nicole Smith:Injuries| Comments (0)
June 29, 2003 / Sunday
Friday's Game: Hot Tamales vs. Anna Nicole Smith
Hey, it's been a while. I played a couple hockey games in that time. Ate a lot of cow, too. Shopped for motorcycle gear. Yummy.
I suppose I should recap my games, or at least show scores so I can keep track of them.
• • •
We won, 5-1. Hey, that rhymes. Perhaps it should go in the blime.
I can't remember much from this game except that it was really damned hot and I felt like passing out in the third period. I was probably dehydrated or something.
Afterward one of my hockey homies, her girlfriend, and two of her other friends stopped me and asked me to flex. They then proceeded to squeeze my arms and make oohing sounds.
Kinda made me feel like a piece of meat.
Cool. Meat is good. Moo.
• • •
Sunday's Game: Tabasco vs. Anna Nicole Smith
We won, 3-2. That doesn't rhyme, but now it does ... whoo.
I had a lot of breakaways and couldn't finish. Well, at least I have my dekes and my speed back. Still looking to get my shot working in a game. Works fine in practice! What's going on? 
Got to play with some of my favorite teammates from one and two seasons ago. That was a lot of fun. One of them bought me a burger afterward. Protein for the six-pack. Yum.
Headed to the gym after that to try to convert some of that cow into ab muscle. Hooah.
11:31 PM | Anna Nicole Smith| Comments (0)
June 09, 2003 / Monday
Cherry Picking
I went cherry picking 3 times today.
1. In the morning at an orchard in Brentwood.
2. In the early evening at Belmont Iceland.
3. In the late evening at Oakland Ice Center.
Anna Nicole Smith vs. Tabasco
Hockey hockey hockey. It had been almost two weeks since our last game. The rink wasn't a total swamp this time, thank doG. We won, we won, 3-2. Yay.
I got to rotate through the forward lines. I don't suck as much as I used to at center. I'm still most comfortable playing right wing. Makes sense since I spent a whole season learning to play hockey at that position. Good passing. Fun fun.
Almost got into a fight. Not my fault. The other player has a reputation for getting into fights. One more and she's probably out of the league. I didn't know that until after the game. Next time I'll be sure to egg her on. Apparently it's already a pet project of a few of my teammates. I guess tonight was my initiation to the club.
Later that evening ...
Some Team vs. Earthquakes.2 @ Oakland Ice Arena
Got to sub for the Earthquakes at Oakland Ice Arena tonight. My goalie from the first game was sick and she needed someone to take her spot. After more bribe offers than I can remember (beer, yummy drink of choice, random energy bars from hockey gear bag), I thought, "Hey, she's the one who sold me her skater spot so I could rejoin the league mid-season, I should at least do her a favor." So off I went to Oakland.
The game was good. I like that team; they're very positive and supportive of each other. We lost, 0-1, but given that we were mostly women playing a team that was almost all men, we held our own.
Well, scorewise and skatingwise and puckwise, at least. I got steamrolled a bunch of times. The minute I stopped skating one of them would knock me over from behind. That kinda sucked 'cause there was nothing I could do about it. What happens when a 200 pound skater runs into a 125 pound one? The 125 pound one falls over. What happens when a 125 pound skater throws herself at a 200 pound one? She bounces off. Dammit.
Anyway, despite the whiplash I had fun. Hooray for Advil and Flexall.
12:22 AM | Anna Nicole Smith:Hockey| Comments (0)
May 27, 2003 / Tuesday
Anna Nicole Smith vs. Hot Tamales
I don't feel like writing, but I will just so I can read this and remember the game.
Final score: 3-3. Would have been 2-3 if we hadn't pulled our goalie in the final two minutes. But then, we lost a player along the way so hey at least we came out even.
Yeah, so we lost a player. One of our defensewomen (that sounds funny, huh?) had an asthma attack midway through the 2nd period and collapsed on the ice. It was scary because she wasn't moving and we didn't know what was wrong. It was even scarier once we figured it out because she wasn't able to breathe and when we went to go get her inhaler we found out she hadn't brought it. Fortunately one of my other teammates had an inhaler for her to use. After what felt like 2 forevers, the paramedics arrived and took care of her.
Bye bye period 2, running clock period 3. Oh, I forgot to mention we started 15 minutes late because Belmont Ice sucks and can't keep the ice cold enough on hot days and we wound up having to do an additional Zamboni dry run just so the rink wouldn't look like a freakin' pond.
Running clock period 3. I had a breakaway. I deked one of their D and she decided to jam her stick blade into the little slot between my boot and skate blade. As I felt my ankle twist most unnaturally I thought, "shit Shit SHIT my ankle's going to break!" It's a little sore, but intact. I have no idea who did it, but I think I scared her by how loudly I screamed "FUCK!!!" on my way down. She kind of stood there and looked like she didn't know what to do for a bit. Rarr.
Okay, so there's the recap. I need to work on my skating. More power and endurance. I feel like an old lady out there.
I smell like hockey gear. Blech.
10:52 PM | Anna Nicole Smith| Comments (0)
May 16, 2003 / Friday
Tabasco vs. Anna Nicole Smith
My first game in months! I didn't get my ass kicked! I also didn't fall on it and reaggravate the grapefruit. Managed to land on my face every time instead.
Final score: 3-0. We won! We shut them out! WhoO!
I love my teammates. In my mind we probably have 9 of the best 15 or so players in the division. Of course, if that were the case you'd think we'd have beaten the other team by a larger margin. Maybe it's all in my head. Maybe we're all just getting warmed up.
Speaking of getting warmed up, or perhaps not getting warmed up, my play of the game came on my very first shift. 30 seconds into my shift I got the puck on our end of the ice, deked two defenders, and scored a breakaway goal on one of the best Red division goalies. The funny thing was I went back to the bench and instead of being all excited I was sitting there thinking, "Coooool." Coooool? Yeah, coooool. After I got away from the defenders everything went into slow motion. It was like watching a movie. Handle, skate, handle, handle, see goalie, see hole, shoot for hole, see puck land in goal. Did I just do that? My body did, not my head. Coooool.
I told my wingmate about how it went into slow motion and she told me I'd been watching too much Matrix. Probably true.
My other move of the night involved a deke, a pivot, a shot, a caught blade on the ice, a 360 in the air, a double knee landing, and a step right back up and into the play. Almost as coooool as the goal!
Anyway, I'm a very happy camper tonight. Hockeeeeey! Whee!
11:11 PM | Anna Nicole Smith| Comments (0)
May 12, 2003 / Monday
Getting back on the ice
Getting back on the ice this Friday. WhoO! Hockeeey!
Guess what the name of my new team is.
Okay, I'll just tell you.
We're Anna Nicole Smith. 
Go Anna Nicole Smith!
Kick some ass Anna Nicole Smith!
Anna Nicole Smith rocks.
